OMG, the Beast is about to spawn again!

[draconis]

Okay, don't say I didn't warn you... ::G::

I just heard from my father -- apparently, my little sister is pregnant with her second child.

Nevermind that her first child is already a teenager, and will be heading to college before this one gets into kindergarten -- and the only way they'll be able to pay for his college education is if they win the lottery, and that's without figuring in the expense of another small child's needs.

Nevermind that they're perpetually strapped for funds as it is, and can't afford the family they have -- including their 15 dogs. (See earlier comment about inability to pay for current child's education)

Nevermind that she is so lazy that she went into teaching so that she would only have to work a portion of the year -- and in spite of the previous two comments, she was shocked and offended when my father told her she should get a summer job instead of laying around on her ass for three months.

Nevermind that she is so small-minded, bigoted, and willfully ignorant that she was unable to get tenure in the TN school system at a time when they were absolutely desperate for teachers.

Nevermind that her personality is such that much of the family routinely refers to her as "Little Bitch" -- not in the sense of "she's such a little bitch," but in the sense of "Go tell Little Bitch that dinner's ready" and everyone knows exactly who is being referred to.

Nevermind that she takes horrible care of herself, and that I don't expect her to change that simply for the benefit of the child she's carrying.

What really depresses me is the fact that the first thought that went through my mind when I heard this was, "Great -- that will give her another 15-20 years to mooch off of our parents." I don't quite think that she deliberately got pregnant again for that specific reason... but I also remember that she deliberately got herself pregnant the first time so that she wouldn't have to go back to college. (Yes, I'm serious.)

This is probably so insensitive of me as to be off the scale, but it would probably be better for everyone if she didn't carry this one to term.

• it is still very early -- as in, probably still within the first month, according to my father. A natural termination now would be emotionally distressing, but at least it would stop there


• she takes horrible care of herself, which would have direct impact on the fetus, as well as on the child after it is born


• her housekeeping skills are nonexistent, and certainly not up to 3 humans + 15 dogs -- introducing an infant into that environment would not be a good thing, IMO


• I'm pretty sure that part of the reason our parents have put up with so much of her crap has been for the benefit of their grandchild. Once he's out of her house, they no longer have to tolerate quite so much of her parasitic behavior

As I said, I'm probably being incredibly insensitive, but I cannot see how this would be a good thing for anyone involved except her, and then only for what it allows her to keep doing -- living off of our parents.

Comments

[radarrider.livejournal.com]

I don't know her so I'm unqualified to make firm judgments but, based on your description, I find it eminently plausible that her primary motivation is the impending departure of her first child and likely subsequent ejection from your parents' lives.

[rhi]

Oh, she wouldn't be ejected. She just wouldn't be able to freeload. Jesus wept.

[jcbdragon.livejournal.com]

As sad as it sounds, the main reason I don't think she did it deliberately and explicitly for that reason is because I don't think she's capable of planning that far ahead.

As for you not knowing her? Count your blessings! ::G::

mom investment

[devohoneybee.livejournal.com]

Just out of curiosity, how is the first child doing?

Re: mom investment

[rhi]

Honestly, the miracle is that he isn't doing worse. The only stable/consistent environment he has is weekends with his grandparents, and it takes him the first 24 hours to steady back down once he *does* have a routine there. As it is, he spends a lot of time off by himself, drawing, or both -- real artistic talent, but no motivation, and he's picking up his father's bigotry, damn it, and belief that 'they're not treating me right' is justification for quitting.

[unmisha.livejournal.com]

I don't think you're being catty at all - you sound immensely frustrated with a bad situation that you can't directly affect. Hell, at least you and your family are realistic about your sister's (many) short-comings.

[rhi]

He's being very realistic, unfortunately. Poor kid, it doesn't deserve this.

[jcbdragon.livejournal.com]

Well... technically speaking, I could directly affect it, but only if I was willing to remove all the mirrors from my home, since I wouldn't be able to bear my own reflection for years to come.

But yeah, not a good situation.

[rhi]

::headdesk:: The kid doesn't deserve this. We don't deserve this (she's been such a bitch the last year her *mom* is complaining; now she'll blame it all on hormones and expect to get away with murder). Your parents don't deserve this, because oh, yeah, they'll expect to keep freeloading... Gah!!

[miintikwa.livejournal.com]

Dear gods above.

I shall pray for a good outcome.

[jcbdragon.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

Personally, I'm hoping she got a false-positive on the EPT.

[miintikwa.livejournal.com]

I was hoping either that, or a miscarriage, which feels harsh, but sometimes is the best outcome.

[mzlizzy.livejournal.com]

Yeouch!

I'd be tempted to get her all sorts of info on giving up your kid for adoption. After all just because she has a kid doesn't mean she has to keep the kid.

[jcbdragon.livejournal.com]

Thanks, but it's not something that she would ever consider.

I mean, who knows what some stranger might teach her little baby? (Completely missing the irony of how much of her own crap she's dumped into the minds of her students over the years.)

No, if she does carry to term, I don't think she would willingly give it up.

Actually, there is exactly one scenario I can think of that might cause her to do so, but it isn't something I would even hint at in public. Suffice to say that the cost involved in that scenario is even greater than it would be if she kept the kid under any other conditions, and is not something I would wish upon anyone, including her.

[irishkate.livejournal.com]

I can't say here what I'd like to say. But hugs to you both. And to her parents, who it seems will have to put up with too much considering they are not getting any younger.

[jcbdragon.livejournal.com]

::hugs:: thank you.

And if you wish to say whatever it was in private, I believe you have my email address.